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Matts Funny Pic of the Week archive |
 Funny pic of the week 31/10/05 |
Feel free to copy and pass around any you like but please keep our site branding intact!
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 Funny pic of the Week 24/10/05 |
For the Staines Massif!
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 Funny pic of the Week 17/10/05 |
Got my legs crossed...Ouch! What are people thinking of when they have erections like this?
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A few Jokes...A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures on the sea. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, a hook, and an eye patch.The seaman asks, "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?" The pirate replies, "We were in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off." "Wow!" said the seaman. "What about your hook"? "Well", replied the pirate, "We were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut my hand off." "Incredible!" remarked the seaman. "How did you get the eye patch"? "A seagull dropping fell into my eye," replied the pirate. "You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?," the sailor asked incredulously. "Well," said the pirate, "it was my first day with my hook"
At an exhibition of local paintings a visitor was admiring a picture. "What a great realist that painter is!" he exclaimed. "What painter?" "The one that painted this picture 'Men at Work'." "Yes, hut something is wrong there. Those men aren't working at all!" "Yes its the amazing sense of realism in the picture that grabs me!"
Bill was short of money and was out looking for a job. The Vicar offered Bill £500 to buy paint and paint the church. Well Bill went out bought some paint and started painting the church. He discovered that he was using more paint than he expected so the added some thinners, well it still covered but not as well as it did at first. He still was using more paint than he wanted to use so he added yet more thinner to the paint. Well the paint was really too thin to cover well but Bill still kept on painting. All of a sudden there was a bolt of lighting and a loud voice from the sky proclaimed "Repaint and thin no more."
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